Flaws and imperfections

Here is a fact of life that I suspect a lot of people are unaware of when it comes to men and woman. Men are born poor and die rich. Woman are born rich and die poor. What does this mean? It means that men value woman on their youth, fertility and chastity. Woman value men on their status, strength and resources. Woman have all of these things from the start. This is why younger woman are considered in their ‘prime’ and why woman find it easier to get sex and find partners when they are young (if they meet most of the list above) as they get older, however these things begin to fade away meaning the older a woman gets the less attractive she is in the eyes of men. For woman, however the traits they find desirable in men are acquired over time resources (aka money, house, car etc…), status and strength all take time to obtain. This is why so many woman prefer to date / settle with older men.

This has created some what of an obsessive culture where men and woman are constantly trying to find short cuts to make themselves look more attractive to the opposite gender. In most cases, these flaws we pick out are often from our own prospective (we can be extremely harsh on ourselves, more so than the average typical stranger or friend) and we can find no shortage of things to ‘fix’. From simple things to wrinkles, grey hair or spots to losing your hair, being pale or having small breasts – its important to realize (and understand) that it is OK to have flaws, and embrace them. I have seen far too many people commit so much determination into removing as many flaws as possible via surgery, pills or cosmetics, that it has turned them into monsters. Too much surgery (lip fillers, bigger breasts etc. etc) will simply make you look worse and do so much damage to your body, and I can assure you — even after all these things are fixed, you will still not be happy, have less money and look worse.

Normally when people are so compelled to fix things like this it is underlining another more serious issue. Perhaps a deep hate or resentment or even a feeling of insecurity that can stem from your past. I can’t stress how important it is to accept yourself for who you are because, I promise you – regardless of how old you get or how bad you think you look there is always someone out there who is willing to put that aside and accept you for you. To add, a lot of people make the mistake of thinking being perfect is the best way to be. The reality is being too perfect and too good is boring, its predictable and too safe. A healthy argument every now and then (as long as it is not too frequent / toxic) is a great way to clean the air and bring out things that need to be said. A spot here, a freckle there, a scar over there — these things are unique and interesting, and they define who you are. The most important thing (for men and woman) when it comes to stable relationships is character. If there was anything worth spending your time and money on its your skills and abilities. Don’t become a monster, don’t throw away money on lip fillers or expensive cosmetic surgery or products. Embrace who you are, and if you can’t do that – accept that even if you are bad know that it is OK too. If you can’t learn to love yourself then learn to love hating yourself.

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